Oh boy—surprising absolutely no one, Disney is back with yet another live-action remake. The Mouse House has dropped the first trailer for “Moana,” starring Catherine Laga‘aia and Dwayne Johnson.
It’s somehow even more disappointing than expected. Everything looks artificial, from the over-the-top CGI to the flat, lifeless backdrops—how does the animated version feel more real than this so-called live-action update? There’s an overwhelming amount of effects, and Johnson, buried under that wig, looks downright ridiculous.
If you’re wondering “why,” you probably already know the answer. This is the latest IP cash grab from Disney, plain and simple—and regardless of quality, it’ll likely sail past $1 billion worldwide next summer. Just look at the success of July’s “Lilo and Stitch” remake.
It’s also worth noting: if you thought “The Smashing Machine” signaled a full pivot for Johnson into arthouse territory, think again. Yes, he has projects in development with Darren Aronofsky and Martin Scorsese, but he remains firmly planted in blockbuster territory, starring in “Moana” and recently wrapping “Jumanji 3.”
For some, the reality is becoming harder to ignore. Before “Smashing,” Johnson meticulously built his career around maximum box office returns. A standing ovation at Venice doesn’t erase that history. For nearly three decades, he’s charged headfirst into blockbuster after blockbuster: “Jungle Cruise,” “G.I. Joe: Retaliation,” “Rampage,” “Red Notice,” “San Andreas,” “Tooth Fairy,” “Central Intelligence,” two “Jumanji” films, multiple “Fast & Furious” entries, and most recently “Red One.” Then there was the “Black Adam” gamble, where he attempted to anchor an entire DC franchise around himself.
Announced in April 2023, the live-action “Moana” is arriving with unusual speed. When it hits theaters on July 10, 2026, the original will be just shy of its 10th anniversary—a surprisingly short turnaround for a Disney remake.