Sexiest Movies of the 21st Century?

“The Best Sex Scenes of the 21st Century”, IndieWire’s sadsack excuse of a list, is filled with quotas and has an all-encompassing inclusive nature to it.

In other words, it’s the perfect example of why American cinema has been so sexless these last 10 or so years. There’s sexual politeness, and politicking, to the criteria IndieWire seems to be using here, so much so that many of the entries completely neglect actual on-screen eroticism in favor of topical resonance.

What’s so erotic about “Moonlight”? “The Lighthouse”? “Midsommar”? Also, where is “Blue is the Warmest Color”? Can’t we separate the art from the artist and acknowledge that Abdelatif Kechiche directed one of the sexiest films ever made?

Other titles missing on IW’s list include “In the Cut, “Monster’s Ball,” “Lust, Caution,” “Bang Bang (A Modern Love Story)” “Benedetta,” “9 Songs,” “Rust and Bone,” “I Am Love,” “Perfume,” “Sleeping Beauty,” and “Chloe.”

Of course, one of the most memorable, and hysterical, sex scenes ever put on film is in “Team America: World Police,” but there is nothing erotic about ridiculously over-the-top puppet sex. Let’s just put it in as an honourable mention.

The 10 sexiest movies of the 21st Century:

“Swimming Pool”, “Unfaithful”, “Mulholland Drive”, “Y Tu Mama Tambien,” “Blue is the Warmest Color,” “The Handmaiden,” “Carol”, “Disobedience”, “Black Swan” and “The Dreamers.”

You know what deserves to be on this list? “Mektoub: Intermezzo.”

Remember, this is strictly 21st Century filmmaking, otherwise you’d have the likes of “Don’t Look Now”, “Persona”, “In the Realm of Senses”, “Belle de Jour”, “Last Tango in Paris”, and “Romance” added in.